She's got whatever It is

Hey Bro,

Wow, it's been a long time since we've posted on this thing.

First things first. Congratulations again on getting engaged! It's about time. She's awesome and I'm very happy for you guys. It was good to see you during break. Sorry I was such a wimp, I'm just tired all the time. I'll be sure to go up and visit you later this winter.

Anyhow, I've been at children's hospital LA this past month. It's been a nice break from county. The hours are a lot nicer and so are the people. I've made a lot of friends in and about the hospital, so I've been having fun. I've been operating my ass off doing small cases like circumcisions to back to back living donor kidney transplants. All in all, it's been a humbling experience. I'm in a new environment and there's always a lot of stuff going on. I've been trying my best, but I keep forgetting small details, names, faces, etc.

It's hard to be a good surgeon...you have to know all the medicine, but also kick ass in the operating room. I'm been getting reamed lately for my mistakes and it's a little tough because I've been beating myself up over all of my mistakes...probably a little more than I should. It's hard to be on top of your game all the time. I'm kind of tired, every once in a while you're tempted to take a shortcut, not look up a lab/study, miss a detail on the physical exam. While these things are all understandable, they're not really forgiveable. I'm thinking I might want to do pediatric urology, but I'm not sure I'm cut out for it. The guys I work with are a moody bunch, but they're really in a league of their own. I've been feeling really dumb a lot lately. I know I'm a pretty smart guy, but it's been a humbling month. I'm tired bro.

Long distance is a bit rough too. Gonna see my girl this weekend for the first time in 3 months. Pretty stoked about that. A guy's got needs - somebody to watch movies with on the weekend, try out new restaurants around town, take to holiday parties, etc. LD is hard.

I've been listening to a lot of country again. I've listened to this song about 200 times this month, according to iTunes.



Talk to you soon bro

-bender

Surviving...

I just finished my first block at county. Going over to children's hospital now. Should be fun. Anyhow, watched my dad perform over the weekend. I guess this is what he has been doing with his free time.





-bender

damn...

I've become like every other person out there. I seriously freaking hate my f-ing job. I'm always messing something up, getting yelled about something or some shit is always going down. Damn...it's hard to go back to work after vacation. Got used to eating 3 meals a day and sleeping 8+ hours a day. Painful...oh well. Whatever. 5 more years to go meng...

-bender

Dammit, I changed again

Good song...

On to other things, so I've been getting my butt kicked left and right at the restaurant. I think my need to have everything be perfectly the way I want it, prevents me from taking time off and leaving things to my guys to handle. Definitely need to learn how to be mellow and just calm. The funny thing is, I was mellow and calm, and then all of a sudden it hit me "this food, everything that goes to the customer.. is a reflection of who I am" and when that hit me I just tensed up and became an overbearing boss. I'm glad I have such a solid team who takes it all with a grain of salt and does their best to keep things fun in the kitchen.

Which brings me to my next subject... my bike. Man that thing is so liberating. When you get down a nice flat road, or get a slight hill to go down, the speed is just so intoxicating. Best part about it, it's completely healthy (other than the fact I might get hit by some jackass in a car). Probably best thing I could do for myself, I think if I didn't have old betsy (I named her) that I'd probably go insane with the stress I pile up on myself.

My only gripe with biking is I wish there was a city where cars were outlawed other than emergency vehicles. Then I could ride with my ipod, but I guess I'll just learn to live with it.

Joe out

Damn...

Sup Joe, sorry I haven't called you bro. No excuses. Man...second year is awful. I'm breaking every hour violation. I go in at 5 am and leave past midnight on most days. I go in on almost all of my days off to look through charts and review cases and make sure everything is ready for the upcoming week. I see consults, operate, take care of my floor patients, run clinic, give case presentations every week and study for the inservice exam during my free time. Damn...I'm tired bro. This is gonna be a rough year.

-bender

Careful what you wish for...

Just listening to some Lisa Lisa. Gotta love those 80's dance songs.

So I'm getting my ass rocked in the kitchen the past couple of weeks. Having to deal with half-brained dimwit cooks, ordering, scheduling, catering, and mentally challenged waitstaff can really suck the life out of you. On top of all of that my uncle and his family came to visit me. I feel bad because my uncle was really ill so he couldn't do much while up here, or eat any food at my restaurant. Was kinda a downer but it was still great seeing part of my family.

So I talked to Ags lately and her and I will be scheduling a vacation for you bro so you can come up and relax.

I've been real bad about posting and I apologize but its just so hard sometimes. I don't even know what to say cuz so much happens and I don't know where to start, or it feels like so little is going down that I'm ashamed to even write anything.

But I guess now I got a lot on my plate, you've had lots on your plate for a while and we both should be better about updating each other on shit that's going down.

Well I'm a chef, kinda... well technically I'm a chef but it still feels weird, like I still have something to prove but I guess that's just me not getting comfy and always feeling like I gotta outdo myself and not settle.

Here's to setting goals and going and getting em.

Go Joe

whew...made it

I'm on my last in-house call of general surgery. I fully expect it to be awful, but hey, at least the pain will be over soon. I'm so done with being an intern...time to move on.

I've been getting worked on transplant surgery. I get yelled at a lot because all of my seniors are exhausted and cranky as shit, in addition, I stopped giving a damn. Great combination...man, I'm so done with this. And that's about it for an update on my life...on to more interesting things.

Since my last post the Lakers have dominated and earned Phil his 12th ring.

Jose Canseco has been embarrassing himself.



Shaq has openly challenged this guy. I might be willing to pay money to see that. Anyhow, hope all is well with you Joe.

-bender