so I'm at mcdonalds standing in line, and this white girl with big fake boobs, and they were uber fake cuz she was like half the size of my ex (who was skinny) just walks in. So I am on the phone with my cousin talking about Japan and stuff and pouring my soda when she comes from behind and is standing absurdly close while I'm pouring. so i go sit down, hang up with my cousin and start eating... she gets her food shortly after and sits down a table across from me and starts eating. Now as thin as she is, I start to wonder... how does she wolf down 2 cheeseburgers, fries, parfait and a sunday and still keep her shape. It's obvious she doesn't work out that intensely because I imagine if she tried running one of her boobs would just fly right off her skinny body. So I am pondering that, totally oblivious to my surroundings when I hear... "excuse me, uh... excuse me" and then I snap back into it... it's the girl and she's talking to me. So being the smooth guy I am, I ignore it kinda and look around to see if its someone else she's calling.. even though I saw her looking straight at me. I finally acknowledge to myself that she is calling me so I swallow the bite of my big mac and say hello... only to notice some guy hitting on her. It was funny cuz I zoned in just as he was saying... "Wow, you are one of the hottest girls I've ever seen" and then he followed it up with "I'm serious, are you a model or something" to which she smiled, turned to him and said "thank you, no I'm not". At that point I was about to say "yes" when she turned to face me again and says "do you know the time". The annoying guy intervene's with splurting out the time and she says... thank you. Then after me not saying a word and feeling stupid I say, "is your watch not working", I noticed she was wearing the watch and found it weird that she asked. She said.. "Ohh... I forgot I was wearing it." (total lie) and I figured out that she was trying to get the annoying guy to leave her alone so she was trying to start a conversation. I had no clue what to do at this point because the girl was very good looking (aside from her boobs which I wouldn't mind except I'm not a big fan of fake boobs) and she was at least a 9 out of 10 (quite possibly could be higher if not for the fake boobs)... but she was trying to use me to get out of a bad situation she was in. So I thought to myself this girl would never talk to me in a million years unless I had something she wanted or needed, so why should I help out a complete stranger. I mean... as a guy.. you know what it feels like to try and pick up on a girl and she shoots you down, or ask a girl to dance at a club and she gives you that... "i'm here to have fun with my girlfriends and dance with them" bullshit... SURE YOU ARE beyotch... and you just dress like a five dollar hooker for the helluvit.
I guess you figured out that I didn't help her out, I was being bitter and annoyed. She was a fake boobed girl who was still very hot, but someone who wouldn't talk to me in a million years except if she needed something so I was ok with leaving her to deal with some asshole who wouldn't take a clue.
then it hit me... what if she would talk to me, how can I be so quick to judge someone when I hate being judged myself just for being a mexican. I know what that feels like, I've been judged as a "mexican guy who isn't good enough for my daughter cuz he's not some mercedes driving fucking doctor/lawyer yuppie and I'm chinese and we are more successful blah blah blah" many fucking times (bitter aren't I) and how was I so quick to become a hypocrite.
Just as I was about to help the girl out, she did me one over. She excused herself from asshole and sat at my table. introduced herself and told me about herself. she was from north carolina, came to cali to become a actress (i'm guessing adult films) and didn't know her way around la. She said she didn't know LA was so car-dependant and I just kinda nodded and told her that she'd need some form of transportation because she would not want to take public transportation being a total stranger to the environment. She tried giving me her cell phone number but I declined, said that it wasn't necessary and gave her directions to the bus hub and let her know the valley and LA were not close to each other unless you had a car. She asked for my number and I gave it to her. Before I left I asked her why she talked to me, and she said she heard my cell phone conversation about my trip to japan. She said that I couldn't be some bum if I was planning on travelling to Japan. She said she was happy that I was zoned off into space instead of staring at her tits. I replied with, well I was zoning off cuz I was thinking about how she stays so thin eating mcdonalds. She laughed and said she doesn't like fast food but LA is not like N.C. or N.Y.
After the chat I said I had to go and thanked her for being so nice, and I asked her if people in N.C. are as nice as her and she says yes. Hmm, duke isn't sounding so terrible anymore and I may talk to Jon about that letter of recommendation. I have been thinking about LA a lot since this afternoon, why are we such dicks, why are we so damn rude. And I figured it out, we're bigger than everything else, we have the nicest weather, we have a lot going for ourselves here. So instead of embracing all that's good, we dwell on the bad stuff, and assume the worst in everyone. We don't know anyone so we assume they are jerks/criminals/assholes.
Thank you Anne from North Carolina, you probably will never call me. Even if you did, you want to be an actress in the valley which can mean one thing. If I did get to go out with you, there is no way I can compare with peter north. But you opene up my eyes, you helped me see that I've been such a hypocrite. Although I may never be able to change my ways, at least I know there are such people out there who aren't so quick to judge.
Joe out...
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