damn

I think i'm going crazy cuz I can't believe I have had the biggest stretch without a bad day. Got my cholestrol checked and got my results... LOWEST they've been in over a year... Then I check my weight... 5 pounds lost and all I've done is drink for 5 days in a row... Although I did drink like 20 lbs of water to make sure I don't dehydrate. And I just barely started working out.

Onto more good news, girl I really want to go out with... texts ME and tells me how much she misses me... going to have to put that in my back pocket after i'm done with all this catering shit.

Then I go into saturday night with no expectations, actually I'm thinking it's going to be a bust, and end up with the hottest Robin batman has ever known. Downing jello shots and then off to another party to drink with a gold digger. Mad props to Sergio for the good time and costume.

Finished the evening off eating some Pancakes chilling with some good looking pirates. And then a quick 2 hour nap and off to see my boys and eat some pho then off to fullerton to spend some time with maiko and then stopped by my dads for a little TFC action and swap recipes.

Must say... saturday & sunday = GOOD Times for my lucky ass...

ONE BLOOD!!!

Let the good times roll....

-Joe-

fantasy basketball

Yo Joe,

How's my team looking, aside from being awkwardly Center heavy?

dennis

that girl...

Damn... saturday was popping...

Gotta head out to some chica's for a lil breakfast and lunch..

More details to come...

-Joe-

hmm...

So I'm getting 3 day weekends in FP, which is awesome. Slept in, went for a run in the morning and spent my afternoon sipping on apricot tea and reading about respiratory infections.



The newest thing in my life is a new TV that my roomie picked up. It's the largest CRT made by sony. It's huge - over 220 lbs. It's awesome. Sitting around and watching You've got mail for like the 30th time. I love meg ryan...she is absolutely enchanting.

On a sidenote, I wonder if this is what residency is gonna be like? Occassional free time, but I'd have no idea what to do with myself. Not sure how to meet new cool people in town? My options include the other type-A's in the hospital and the nuts at church.

-bender

causing a commotion

Damn, I've been hogging the blog lately... Ma Bad

Alright, back to more important things. I never realized how much trouble the last girl I had around caused for me. She got me OUT of working out, even though in her head she was "pushing me to workout" the only thing she did was make it damn near impossible for me to fit working out into my schedule. Well I started back up again and this time I can't let some girl screw it up.

I can't cut the habit of drinking coke, all I can do is try and taper off to a bare minimum. Which seems to be like 1 can every two days or so. The worst thing is I get mad that my boys always want to go out and drink and it makes me sad cuz all those calories and evil fatness they are pumping into my system could be so much sweeter. Too bad coke isn't an alcoholic beverage otherwise it'd truly be the nectar of the Gods.

I am happy to be Paul right now, and like I told J, i'm fantabulastic... but something is missing and I'm glad that I feel that way, because then I might become content.

Keep on trekking...

Rock, Rock On!!

-Joe-

Whoa Nellie

Felt like putting up some thoughts on paper so just ignore this...

Hmm a good invention would be hovering drones that fly out of your car to locate a parking spot for you. Then you would just need to outfit them with a projector to spit out an image of a car parked there so no one would jack your spot while you are heading over to the spot.

Been trying to come up with a new type of "gravy" for potatoes and such... the different recipes I've tried to create were either too flashy or too expensive, or just gross (lima bean flavored).

I wonder how the new "chemical romance" cd is.

I need broccoli and some popcorn for a new concoction I wanted to try out... i wonder if I should go with microwaveable or with he jiffy pop... hmm... decisions...

Hmm... to cheddar, or not to cheddar...

3 years too late

Fuck man, just wrote out a nice long blog and my pc crashed... I can't wait until the new macs are out..

Ok so let me remember...

I wish I was the same old Joe I was before, looking for a great girl who was accepting and into similar things as his weird fucked up self.

That joe would be fucking happy as hell right now. Instead... I'm a selfish bastard who is only interested in getting what he wants and obtaining success in the one aspect he never bothered with... his career... the one thing that takes more of your life than any other... basically my life.

I promised everyone that if I went ahead with this crazy fucking idea... that I'd bust my ass to succeed.

My entire adult life has been wasted chasing women, doing the stupid things for the stupidest reasons and believing I had something great. I never did, and if I keep up that behavior, I never will. You must sacrifice, if you don't... then you can't have success. Bender almost gave up his life to get where he is now... me? I never sacrificed shit as far as I am concerned.

This time, I'm doing it right and I'm going to sacrifice. I'm going to do my partying and avoid anything serious that might interfere with my plans. That means no serious relationships, because honestly... starting a restaurant or catering company requires time, time that makes a relationship impossible.

This is all great and easy when you don't meet great girls, except I met a great girl. She has a japanese Nintendo 64 for pete's sake... AND a Japanese version of Mario Kart and Mario 64. Yes... as nerdy as that sounds, it's a very hot thing to me. What's even hotter is she is a very attractive japanese girl with an accent that just sends chills down my spine when she says "chocolate chip".

It's an interesting story how I came to meet her, but it mostly involves me being a goofy ass weirdo walking up to a complete stranger in an empty sushi restaurant and saying "hi, today you are the luckiest girl in the world because you get to meet this really funny and weird guy". Her response was surprisingly, "really, well you might be the lucky one but we'll find out". Then I threw down two sake bombs, found out some about her and got her number. In my head I thought, maybe I'll go out to a club with her dance, maybe see where it goes. Nothing serious, just be a manwhore and hopefully not get any diseases. Next thing I know, she wants to meet for dinner and drinks, so I oblige. Next thing I know she wants to meet up again, she loves my confidence/cockiness and finds me hilarious.

She's great but something isn't right, so I decided to blow her off tonight. I'm kinda feeling like shit right now, but I'm going out with the boys tonight, and again tomorrow... to the meatmarket. Not to meet a new girl, but because I don't want a relationship, I want to be selfish for a while... and even with the holidays coming and it'd be great to have a date to events, I'd rather fly solo and be a selfish asshole.

I hope when I get to the promised land, when I have that nice house in la jolla next to dr. bender, I'm the same hopeless romantic dumbass I started off as. Because as of now, It doesn't feel like it.... but I guess that's something I might have to sacrifice... but hopefully it's only temporary.

joe out...

So what??

South Park is great... always brings my chums and I together for some good laughs.

Oh yeah... get the song One Blood by The Game

very good urban beat...

I'll update later when my mind is more clear.

-joe-

switch weekend

So I'm officially done with ob/gyn and am much happier person for it. This was a great weekend to just relax and reconnect with people.

Friday was great. Drank some beer and played some poker with brashkan and the boys. My roomie and I colluded and destroyed everyone, then bought everyone dinner afterwards. Everything that happened after that has kinda been a blur...

hanging out with rabbit. We had to improvise.










Then we got the munchies...












Later that day, we went to golfland. Ags was having a pretty good day and got a couple of hole-in-ones. It was nice to play some putt putt, slug a few hardballs at the batting cages and shoot zombies with my broken gun.

-bender

time for my family vacation

strike or spare....

Random bowling event in Torrance with weird people... turned out to be fantabulastic.

Normal drinking with the boys in the parking lot and bar of the bowling alley... turned out to be fanfuckintastic.

Being unemployed is pretty fun considering I am not broke.. thank you Sony for all that OT money. I've never been a genius or very smart with my money but I put an awful lot of my money that I made in SD away for a rainy day. I don't know if it's because I knew that I was going to chase my dream or if I knew that if I didn't hide it my evil gf would have squandered it away on meaningless bullshit she would have been ungrateful for. But I'm glad I hid it away because it's enabled me to prepare to chase a dream and I couldn't have asked for more. I don't know if it's fate or what it is but the closer I get the happier I get, not scared, not intimidated but happier and more confident.

I'm waiting for the new MACs to come out so I can get one, and also waiting for the XBOX to drop in price so I can get one of those as well.

I was sitting down talking about WWF and the wrestlers with my cousin Che the other day. We got to the topic of Stone Cold and I sighed... as much as people say about WWF I think the one thing that hooks people is that despite what you say... it's tough, and a lot of the hits are real even if they are extremely exaggerated. We all know that a lot of the people that watch WWF fit into that Nerd Category but let's skip that (cuz I just might be one). Back to Stone Cold, he gave everyone exactly what they needed... a wakeup call. He gave us DTA and he gave us a never say die attitude that we lost. He isn't a world leader, he never cured cancer, but if you look at 1998-2001 he turned a dying and almost bankrupt million dolllar company into a Billion Dollar company. The crazy thing about it is, he did it by doing things on his terms, being a redneck badass who wouldn't say die... no matter what.

When I look back on that, it makes me say wow... 1 guy turned a dying culture and made it so successful that it took over the industry. I know my food won't change the world, I could die in a car accident in the next 40 minutes on the way to my cousins 5th birthday party and the world will never know how good my marinade is starting to become, BUT I am going to live on my terms... I will not change and will not be someone's puppet and when I finish this off, hopefully I've got my overpriced house in Pasadena and my summer home in La Jolla next to Bender. If I fail, I'll fail on my terms and have lived more free than ever before.

It's very funny, because Che and I were laughing at how I can't get serious or philosophical about serious things, but I can grab the most serious and best lessons... from the most random things ie: WWF and Stone Cold

I am nerdy, not intelligent but nerdy... and I love it...

Joe Out.... and very very hungover...

Really?

Here's an email correspondence between my academic adviser and myself. I've can't help but say that I'm a bit disappointed by his response.

Me:

Hi Dr. H.M.,

How is everything going? I really like both medicine and peds and would love to do both. It seems like a great way to have patient continuity from birth until death without all the surgical, psych and ob issues that FP docs have to worry about. I've been looking at the programs at USC, UCLA and UCSD and wouldn't mind putting in a little extra time to be double boarded. I have a sneaking suspicion that if I practice at Kaiser, I may not be able to practice that kind of medicine. I'm not much of a businessman and don't know how well I'd do in a small private practice. I'd love to hear what your thoughts are on this matter. As always, thank you very much for all of your help.

bender

Re:

Hi, nice to hear from you.

As for your question of feasibility of doing both med/ped, I would like to discourage you from doing that. It is challenging enough to keep current with one field and doing both will dilute your effort and expertise. You also have to realize that you will have keep recertifying. Even once every 10 year is very demanding just because of lack of time outside your work and family. Keep in mind that you will not be free and single forever. In 5-10 years, your life will be very different from the present time in terms of different kinds of challenges. Hopefully, by then, you will have married and have kids. That change alone will limit a lot of things.

When I was a medical student, I once thought of the same idea but I am glad that I did not follow that path.

Between choices between med and ped, I would recommend med because it will offer you more options down the road in terms of specialties.

I would recommend looking into outpatient oriented specialties like allergy, endocrine, rheum. I think you will be happier with your professional life.
Primary care is rewarding in its own way but you need to have a special mindset to enjoy it.

I am sorry that I could not meet you earlier as I planned. I was drowning with the work for a while.

If you would like to come and talk to me more, let me know when it's convenient for you.

I will see you then.

H.M.

-bender

I'm out

Finished my last day at Kaiser L&D. I thought this day would never come. I'm slightly sad because I love the intern that I'm working with now. Had a blast working with her on gyn/onc and had a blast goofing off with her the last couple of days.

Memorable events from today. A woman came in for a rule-out labor check. She was super nervous and uncomfortable with guys. Of course, my intern let me do the speculum exam. Like a dork, I stood up and said, "I'm sorry I make you so uncomfortable"...awkard silence. Almost creepy. My intern and I walked out and started cracking up. Why am I so weird?...ugh

Later in the day, I wanted to learn how to draw blood cuz I keep messing up in clinic. I had a little too much fun. I put on multiple tourniquets to make my veins pop out. Then I went around telling people that I was the Ultimate Warrior. haha. Remind me not to let my intern evaluate me.

On my way home, I called my mom. She was saying something about some guy at my home church who finished his residency and was advertising his new private practice clinic at church. I was horrified. Church is a place I go to worship something that is greater than myself. I don't go to socialize. I leave my politics at the door. There I am reminded of my personal shortcomings and the grace of God that has privileged me with learning the art of medicine and surrounded me with friends far greater than I ever deserved. In my place of worship, I can take a step away from all the crap I see in this world and focus on something greater than myself and the selfishness I see around me. To advertise in church is just plain wrong.

Advertising in church just reminds me of how culturally different my parents are from me. To them, it seems so obvious. There is a caring person at church, who speaks their language and understands their customs who can take care of their health. Of course, it makes sense to serve your church community...still sounds like shameless advertising to me. I'll get off of my soapbox now.

I then told my parents something that reflects a lot of what I have seen in my medical training. I said that it's a bad idea to have someone from your church be your doctor. They can't take optimal care of you if you can't be upfront about your drug use, psychotic notions and the pus oozing out of your orifices after that night of drunken sex. silence...um...I'll call you again in a week mom.

-bender

broken family

strike up the band...

let me tell you something...

I have a bad feeling about my future right now...

I come from a broken family and fear I will only continue the legacy...

Underachieve like a champion and if I do start a family, ruin those kids lives.

hating myself right now...

Tiny Miracles

Two years, almost to the day, there was a hectic day in labor & delivery. A laboring mom was suffering from a seizure, so all the staff headed over. Out of the blue, a nurse screamed, Deeble, get the fuck over here. My now attending rolled over to triage 4. Couldn't pick up the baby's pulse on the fetal heart tracing. Baby probably moved...kept moving the sensor. Odd. He brought in ultrasound. The baby's heart had stopped cold and the heart valves were flittering. They rolled out a code-C and got that baby out.

The baby turned out for the most part ok. She is deaf, but otherwise ok. Admitedly, I'd be depressed if I went deaf, but this kid is a little miracle. She rolled into the ward today on her stroller. She had brown matted bed hair and big green eyes...adorable.

On a sidenote, the women I work with in OB are simply amazing. I love them and I wish I were attracted to them and vice versa. It would be amazing to share my life with such witty, radiant, kind-hearted folk. I wish I could bottle their brilliance to sprinkle on myself on nights when I want to fly.

beep beep beep. Time is up. Chicken is done on my microwave.

-bender

summertime in the E.L.A

yup, it's fall but I don't care, I can do what I want.. it's my blog...

so I've been partying it up a lot lately, and damn it's been great. I guess I decided since I was waiting on school that I'd enjoy the few months I have left. I did some research for ovens and such and talked to my future partner about setting up a kitchen for our preparations. I don't know what it is about a $30,000 oven that excites me but I so want it. It's the shiet, like the oven of my dreams. I literally got a hard-on when the guy was showing it to me... it was so sexy... I was just imagining myself smacking down some wicked recipes on that bitch.

The heartbreaker is that I can't really drop that kind of dough on an oven so I might settle for a 15K one, but it still was nice... I'm debating right now...

Afterwards I called around looking for my van... bah... fucking nothing good out right now so I gotta be patient and wait.

It was scary as I was doing all this... It occurred to me, "fuck man, I'm really doing this, I'm really making it happen". I stopped and enjoyed it for a split second then went to starbucks to flirt with the barista I met saturday night. We actually had nothing in common when we were sober so I got my free coffee and went on my way...(NO that isn't code for she rejected me, although I wish she had cuz it was really awkward)

All this before it's 5pm... fuck man.. I need to start waking up early again... the early worm gets the bird... or is it... bah whatever...

song of the moment.. Incomplete by Bad Religion

-Joe

stupid starbucks hippies...

Despite my better judgement.. I rolled out of bed today with a hangover...

Did last night happen... or did I dream it...

I hope I dreamt it, but when I looked at the phone and saw 4 missed calls and 3 vm's, it became clear that last night was no dream.

I wish I could hit the mute button when people start talking, it really irritates me, especially when they discuss things like they are experts. I had a chinese guy tell me about making a burrito this evening... I have been managing my aunts restaurant for 8 months now, and eating mexican food almost every day of my fucking life... I'm pretty sure I don't need to be lectured on burrito's by an asian guy. But there he was, telling me how to do it, so I told him to go home. It was funny to watch his reaction, he was super pissed off and asked to talk to the owner. When I gave him a business card with my name on it, that only pissed him off more.

I really don't mind if you want your burrito a certain way, I can be picky at times too. But when you tell me I don't know what I'm doing and speak to me like I'm a piece of shit, then don't expect me to uphold that whole "customer is always right" bullshit motto that people always spew out. The customer is always right until they become a fucking prick, then they can go fuck themselves.

Another annoying thing is when people make up stories... ARGH I want to beat them with sticks... like when they say they had a bad batch of beans and it made them sick, so I tell them that we had no other complaints so it couldn't have been the beans. Then ask them for a receipt so I can refund them, of course they don't have one. Stupid people... like I'm going to be handing out food for free... The worst part about it... they are always the same people outside the restaurant bitching about how Bush ruined the US and they can't get a job. Nobody ever takes responsibility for anything anymore. I hate it and I hate them. If you can't accept that your life is fucked up because you fucked it up, then you are an idiot and I hate you. (I would like to say, this doesn't go for people who were sexually abused as children cuz it's not your fault that you're fucked up, it's your parents or uncles or whoever, or if you were paralyzed due to a drunk driver and/or drive by shooting or some shit... THEN you can bitch about other people fucking up your shit)(I'm sure I missed a couple of scenarios, but you get the picture)

Back to my story... bah.. fuck it... I hate people right now..

Joe is out.. and fucking tired...

P.S. YES Bender you shithead, I did have that listed and I once too was retarded... SHIT or GET OFF THE POT

really??

Just had the weirdest night. Started at a house party in montebello for a bday, then was relocated to west covina for another party, then back to the montebello party, and finally ended up in front of a house in commerce/montebello. The weirdest part about all of this is we knew nobody at any of the first 3 places we went to. Yet drank and met the nicest people possible (with an exception to some ghetto ho's). We drank it up with some youngens' and then drank with some youngerens' (i know it's not a word but still).

I find it funny because Bender and I are as different as night and day. He went to school with the elites. He knows future pulitzer and nobel peace prize winners. Me, I know convicts and future convicts. He spends his days with some of the brightest doctors, and drinks and discusses matters that actually count for something. I spend my time with 6th year community college members and college dropouts.

I guess what I'm saying is, damn.... what are you doing bro? Why you still friends with a loser like me? Are you retarded? Or am I your connection to the ghetto? The guy keeping you grounded and one of the people you are trying to save? Maybe that's it, maybe I don't know... but after hitting up all these parties and meeting some crazy tricks... I know one thing, I'm glad I finished up school and I'm glad I saved up for a rainy day. I know why I'm so determined to succeed and maybe one day have a place where nice doctors and nobel peace prize winners will eat, hopefully bender will bring them.

Goodnight all...

P.S. I hate people who talk about politics, they seriously annoy the shit out of me. ALL they do is talk, they don't do shit about it, even when they supposedly do something (such as demonstrate or whatever those hippies do)it accounts for nothing. The world is fucked up, you can't do anything about it but deal with the shit when it hits the fan. Stop complaining about wars you can't stop and cheer for the guys getting all those headshots, cuz they are only keeping themselves alive an extra day while you sit here and bitch about what they are doing. Gooo headshotters... BOOO hippies and hippy sympathizers.

P.S.S I am not sure if I made it clear, but tree hugging hippies bug the shit out of me.

It is done...

the list is updated.

-bender

addendum. What an awesome ad. Why can't I write something like this?

You and me babe, how about it...

I finally finished my last night of overnight call at kaiser L&D. It was a long ass day, and it went something like this.

Morning rounds: We had a teenage girl who was sent to us from stockton for a vulvar abscess. She had apparantly somehow managed to get a massive MRSA infection after cutting herself while shaving her cootch. The presentation somehow degenerated into the attendings talk about how they don't see pubic hair anymore since everyone shaves. lovely. Seriously, it's not sexy. It'd be like hooking up with a pre-pubescent girl.

I scrubbed into a C-section in the afternoon for failure to dilate. The woman was crying throughout the entire prep period. She was crushed that she couldn't deliver vaginally. She was also really afraid. Like any good med student, I hung out with her and blotted her tears with tissues. It was kind of awkward considering she was buck naked and in crucifix position on a surgical bed. In a weird way, it was actually really touching. She cried the whole time, then started sobbing when her daughter was born. The child was absolutely beautiful. The patient exhausted herself, so she snored like a chainsaw for the rest of the surgery...it was really cute.

I scrubbed out to the sound of some thug yelling across the hall, "Yo Dee, Where you be dawg! You missed it man." I missed the delivery of a couple that I strangely got along with really well. I kid you not, this girl was a G11 P3173. She had a rapid delivery and delivered in her room even before the nurses had a chance to help her push. When I walked into the room, she yelled at me for missing the delivery. She said that she held out for as long as she could so that I could delivery her baby, but in the end, baby won. wow. gee...thanks. The nurses kept looking at me kind of funny after that.

At 10 pm, I watched survivor with the midwife and the attending.

Later that evening, a nurse that was working with one of my patients got a needle stick. HIV positive. I can't imagine what must be going through her head. She washed off the wound, drew some of her own blood for testing, got some meds, then just kept on working like a champion. Damn...kaiser nurses are badasses. Poor gal.

It was all kind of downhill from there. A lady with twins came in for preterm pregnancy at 22 weeks...those kiddies weren't gonna make it. I went in with my residents to talk to them about what was going on. I felt like I couldn't get out of there fast enough. Not much you can say or do to make things better at that point, especially when you're meeting those folkd for the first time and they have been waiting their whole lives to have kids. I'm so sorry.

Around midnight, we got a call from the ER. There was a patient who came in for vaginal bleeding. She had seen her OB for the same problem a couple of months ago. She had a endometrial biopsy done. She is postmenopausal, ultrasound showed a thick stripe, etc. She fucking had cancer and the doc had never followed up with her. Outrageous...she came into the ER bleeding like a river, demanding to know what her biopsy result showed. We used a override password to schedule her in the next day with the OB who biopsied her. Shit, there is no excuse for that. Seriously...that was incredibly fucked up.

At 2 am, a lady rolled in complaining of intense vaginal burning after taking a salt bath. I sterile spec'd her and sample her frothy discharge. Saw a lot of little swimming dudes under the scope. haha. The lady had trich. The best part was when she said "I keel you muthafucker" and went to go kick her husband's ass in prison.

The call ended perfectly. I was waiting on a multip who was SVE 9/C/+1. At 5:20, I went in to take a 10 minute nap so that I'd be vaguely awake for rounding at 5:30. I walked to the nurses' station at 5:30...baby delivered. My attending winked at me and said, you snooze, you lose. touche.

-bender

silly rabbit, trix are for kids

Damn.... nothing like clubbing and getting macked on by cute drunk girls from Texas to raise your spirits when they are already high from a UCLA victory hours earlier. Must have felt good ehh?? Damn skippy, too bad I wasn't in the mood for handing out the pimpjuice so I behaved myself and the extension of my entourage took care of her. Worst part is, when she was sober, I had a fun time dancing with her... oh well.

This along with some other out of state girls have led me and my cousin to the conclusion that we must go out of state to find ourselves some quality girls. This coupled with the fact that most of our trusted friends have said the same thing. Women are just so much more fucking awesome when they aren't from cali. I fought this horrible "myth" that I called it, for years I defended and claimed LA and Cali had the best girls ever. This was before I met Anne earlier this year, Joanne, and Tasha.. together with the nice girl I met this weekend I learned one thing. LA women are just ugly and evil. To go with that LA men are fucking bastards... I hope I am not in that category but I fear I may, oh well.

Why is it so hard to go to a club and dance with a girl, why do all guys try to fuck the girl they are dancing with? And why do all girls assume that's all we guys want? Bah, such a vicious cycle that sucks but I'm glad I got a lot of good vibin peeps with me to keep me away from that shit.

Dru threw one helluva gig this weekend, or club event, whatever you want to call it.

My hat off to you dru, you did the unthinkable, you made my great weekend even GREATER.

To all you non-Cali girls (excluding ny and nj cuz they suck more tiger cack than LA girls) please look me up while in LA.

Joe out....

P.S. Sorry to hear about your Cardinals getting their asses beat again Bender, it's ok though... at least my boys in blue came out victorious (even though I was hella buzzed throughout the game)

Saved by the Bell

Just got off another overnight call, but I managed to avoid rounds in the morning. The 2nd patient into morning rounds, a code C went off and all hell broke loose. I made my escape through the back...felt like the old school batman. You know, when he throws a smoke bomb and disappears. Anyhow, a few thoughts on this last call.

Names are important. I met mom, then I met dad...Mr. Elvis Press Lee. haha. You're kidding, right? I really tried to keep a straight face. I bet he gets that a lot.

Food is important. For the last 30 hours or so, I fed exclusively on clif bars. My poop is like meconium, so gross. That shit doesn't wipe off. I hate cheapo kaiser toilet paper.

You should not have expectations...they just mess things up. I admited a beautiful multip around 6 am. I literally spent the entire freaking day grooming her. Checked in and wrote reports every hour or so, got her drinks, pillows, the works. Made sure that her family absolutely loved me and had my supervisor introduce me and get approval for me to explicity perform the vaginal delivery. I skipped 2 c-sections and waived triage just to make sure that I was around to deliver. This kid was mine. I waited 13 hours for this lady's cervix to fully dilate and it was time to rock and roll. My attending and chief resident, nowhere to be seen. I asked the midwife to assist me. The stupid bitch grabbed the intern and had her deliver so that the intern could get more experience. It's been 2 ridiculously painful - made me swear never to go into ob/gyn, dead libido I hate vagina - weeks. Not a single delivery. And this stupid midwife took that away from me...I was pretty disappointed. Surprisingly, the delivery itself was not disappointing at all. As soon as the child was born, the dad, aunts and grandmas all started crying. It was beautiful...it should be like that every single time. Babies are such precious amazing things and it blows my mind every time one is born. Well, maybe except for the ugly ones. But in general, they're pretty great. Where was I going with this...oh yeah.

hmm...the best part of my day was this. I had the email below open on the screen. I was exhausted, so I forgot to close the screen in the physician's room. I went to take a meconium dump and came out to see that several people had viewed the screen, much to my chagrin. Guess I won't be asking for evals from them. haha.



stupid gmail.

-bender

p.s. Don't ditch class when the IOR is teaching it. Now I have to elaborate on why I ditched class and write a paper on the entire discussion. Good times...stupid Dr. dick wrinkle.

FU*K MAN

Have tried to blog 4 times now...

FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT PC crashed each time..

Anyways gonna post real quick..

I'm shopping for a laptop, probably gonna get a MAC.. Yes I said it, A mac... so get over it. I am sick of Windows and sick of PC's hardware problems. I'd rather have everything completely controlled by one company that way when the shit hits the fan.. I'm going after 1 fucker and only 1 fucker.

So I put in my two weeks at work... they worked me like a dog and when it came time to move me up, they screwed me over. They hired two new peeps for that position.. both with less experience than me. I see it as a slap in the face becqause they know jack shit about these people and they know I'm the most reliable worker at that restaurant who is a non-salary position. The manager I put in my two weeks with pleaded with me to stay but I wasn't hearing it.

That's the problem with America as a whole... you kill yourself for a company and they want to exploit you. If you are the best at your job... you won't ever get moved out of it. They want you to be content with that while you watch some handjob with nothing to offer take your promotion just because they know someone. Well that's fine and dandy for other people, but me... I'll be damned if I take that shit. I will never get fucked in the ass and have never been scared of being unemployed because there is always someone out there who needs a hard worker with a brain. And I'll probably stay there until they try to fuck me over and this cycle will repeat until I open up my own place.... welcome to the rest of my life.

Joe is tired but happy

P.S. I think I picked the best possible career for me, I get to do my two favorite things... bust my ass and at the end of the day feel good about what I did, and two... I get to talk to people (and flirt with hot chicks)

Ridin' me

Today was brutal. For L&D, I usually switch back and forth between triage and the delivery/OR suites. For some reason, the triage nurse had it in for me today. Kept yelling at me whenever I asked for a chart, saying she wasn't ready or something like that. Then she kept shutting curtains in my face when I tried to enter delivery rooms and told me to get out. Every time she walked by me, she'd snarl, What do you want now? I think the worst part is, I had to swallow my pride and apologize for stuff that I couldn't have known about in order to get in and see patients. She later went off on a tirade about what a privilege it was for me to learn in a private hospital and blah blah. She is a larger, bitter bitter woman. Her nursing student and I talk mad shit about her. haha.

Later in the day I just said screw it. I went to go out and hang out with my two favorite C-section patients. One is a 41 y/o Russian woman who has the cutest daughter resulting from an oops. She is hilarious, saying things like "You not married? You should date nice Russian girl. Find one in University. Stay away from high school girls."...um...I'll keep that in mind. My other favorite gal is a PPROM at 24 weeks because of cervical incompetence. I ditched my team to watch telenovelas with her. They're on from 1-4 and 7-10. They're actually pretty good and all the actors are hot.

-bender

ugh...3 more weeks of this...

Took weekend call today and for the most part, it went pretty well. It was like a living stereotype. There were three female attendings on board and they were all really nice/sweet people. However, it was painful following them around all day. They took long 30 minute breaks to chit-chat about their kids and how cute they are. The worst part was when the attendings joined forces with 12 females nurses to talk about Grey's anatomy and having steamy dreams about Mcdreamy. Puhleaze...you're freaking killing me. Project runway sounds like a great idea, but I don't think it'll work out. I'll never understand. The ironic part is, all the labor room televisions were set on football. Leave it to the good ole dads. I'm not really interested in that either.

I will probably get a lot of heat for this comment, but the thought strongly crossed my mind that I don't want to go into ob because it's a female dominated field for exactly the same reasons that I wouldn't want to go into ortho because it's a ridiculously male dominated field. This doesn't mean that I couldn't possibly enjoy the respective fields, but I don't want to spend 80+ hours in a group dynamic that makes me uncomfortable. I'm just not comfortable in large groups of a single gender. I really need balance, and ob/gyn is really lopsided. If you look at residency lists, aside from davis, peds tends to be heavily female weighted too.

ugh...these dumb thoughts keep me distracted...

-bender